Can you be bi and ace
As part of Double attraction Awareness Week, we are posting more Aspec Voices articles about bi aspecs. This is the second article that focuses on ace-spectrum people who distinguish as bisexual, biromantic, or bi-aligned in some other way. Thanks again to all our contributors!
Introductions
Alphena – I’m a Demi-Bi-Romantic Asexual, and I use They/She pronouns.
Aske – Biromantic asexual
Kimberly – I name as Biromantic Asexual.
Maria – Bi asexual
Nicky Rodriguez – I usually just say I’m acebi, but I most identify with the gray-ace and bi-romantic labels.
Shai – I am probably a grey ace. Maybe just plain ace.
Questions
How do you experience connected to/define your bi identity?
Alphena: I feel very related to it in how I’m romantically attracted to people. I’m romantically attracted to all genders, though, sometimes in different ways.
Aske: The way I specify my bi individuality is connected to my romantic and spiritual attraction to both male and females.
Kimberly: I characterize my Bi persona as simply Bi – not Pansexual since I’m not a sexual person. I still touch a connection with the Bi+ comm
What does asexuality/asexual mean?
In the simplest of terms someone who is asexual is someone who does not experience sexual attraction.
This means that they don’t trial that feeling of looking at a person and thinking ‘I’d like to include sex with them.’
It’s crucial to note that a sudden loss in sexual drive if you’ve previously felt sexual attraction could be a reaction to medication, a change in your mental health or something else. This can happen to anyone and if this does happen, you can chat to your doctor about what’s going on and figure things out.
Does that mean asexual people don’t fancy anyone else?
Some asexual people exposure attraction, but don’t undergo that they want to act on that attraction sexually. This is famous as romantic attraction, where they want to acquire to know somebody and do romantic things. What those romantic things are depends on each person – it could involve going on dates, holding hands or cuddling.
Asexual people can also identify as gay, lesbian, bisexual or straight depending on who they feel attraction to.
Other asexual people don’t exposure any sexual or affectionate attraction to
As part of Double attraction Awareness Week, we are posting more Aspec Voices articles about bi aspecs. This article focuses on ace-spectrum people who identify as bisexual, biromantic, or bi-aligned in some other way. Thanks again to all our contributors!
Introductions
Alex – Asexual, biromantic
Amandine (she/her) – I’m asexual and bisexual.
Daisy – I am bi ace. I actually would say sapphic leaning, biromantic, sex-repulsed asexual! But bi ace works.
Marta – asexual arospike biromantic
Rosa – Bi ace
Vic – asexual and and bi-aesthetic (is that a thing?) and questioning bi-romantic
Questions
How do you experience connected to/define your bi identity?
Alex: There are people from multiple genders I consider nice to look at and maybe even somehow attractive but never in a sexual way.
Amandine: I detect as bisexual instead of biromantic because I sometimes experience slight sexual attraction / fantasize on men and women. This part of my identity is really important for me personally.
Daisy: I am biromantic but before I understood myself as asexual just identified as bi.
Marta: Since the main type of attraction I perceive is p
I pretty much always knew I was bisexual. A lot of people contain heard me say this over time: it was basically a non-issue. By middle school, I was secure in this truth. Lots of my friends were, too. It made sense to me, and it wasn’t a huge deal. This was about 15 years ago at this point, so of course I heard stigmatizing remarks in the media and from society. “Bisexuals are just confused” and blah, blah, blah. Even at that age, I knew that this was a load of garbage because, there I was, 10 or 12 or whatever, bisexual and knowing it. Not a bit of confusion.
If only things stayed that straightforward in life. I was always secure in this part of my self, yes, but I grew up and labels were added and I grappled with uncertainty for the first time in the sexual identity realm. You might be reading this and wondering what the hell any of this has to do with an ace blog. As it happens, this week is Bisexual Awareness Week, and I feel compelled to discuss my dual identities, because so often things aren’t that simple.
Bisexuality figured out. Che
As a bisexual person I feel that there is a lot about asexuality that I can empathise with. Both of our sexualities cover a broad spectrum of experiences but are quite simple to explain. Both ace and bi people are subject to inaccurate assumptions, existence erased, being doubted (“How do you know you are [asexual / bisexual] if you have not tried…?”) and being asked invasive personal questions. At its worst this can lead to us existence shamed, for allegedly creature too sexual if you are bi or for not being sexual enough if you are ace – it seems you cannot win one way or the other sometimes.
A few years ago I felt quite isolated not knowing any other bi people and, after I finally met some, not knowing whether there were any where I operate. It made it particularly difficult for me to be open about my identity at work. It sounds obvious in hindsight but it did not occur to me until I spoke to a group of ace people that this is a common experience for them too.
So it feels quite natural for me to be an ace ally, be that defending their place in the LGBT+ community (the + is there for a reason and the A in the full LGBTQIA acronym stands for ace after all) or speaking out against aphobia o